Wherein Cam rants about the use of certain words and female sexuality

[misscam]

Couldn't we ban the w-word from being used about women unless it's bloody well what they do for a living*???? * Even then, I am not too fond of it.

What is this trend in fandom and elsewhere of using sex-related slurs about women by women who don't like them, anyway? Getting enjoyment from sex does not make you a whore. Dressing revealingly is not an invitation to rape. Sleeping with more than one guy does not make you a slut. (Though if you don't practice safe sex, it can make you very sorry. Don't be sorry. Be safe.) Not being afraid to tell people off does not make you a cunt.** Times have changed, at least in some parts of the world. Female sexuality is becoming her own, as it should be. Making your own choices about sex can be empowering, and yes, that bloody well includes the choice to abstain from sex too. (Given it's your own choice and not one put on you, of course.) So why is enjoying sex or using sex or even being sex first in line of insults so very often when a female character is disliked?

I'm not sure the answer will please me much.

But here is a note for the world - I like sex, when done well. I am not a whore. I sometimes sleep with guys because I want to and no other reason. I am not a slut. I sometimes have a dig at people. I am not a cunt. I sometimes show a bit of cleavage or skin elsewhere. I am not invinting guys to rape me. (RAGE.) What I am, is a woman, and my sexuality is my own. I will make my own choices, be they wrong or right. If that is the only thing you can insult me with, then I pity you.

Also, I will kick your arse if I choose to. Okay?

I'm glad we had this little talk.

** Some of these words have through their usage changed some of their meaning at least. And yes, males do also get called dickheads, so I suppose it does go both ways.

Speaking of things vaguely sex-related, I got this review in my inbox the other day:
I really admire the fact that you are the few who can actually spell.I mean really most of these poeple can not slow down spelling. Mostly what I dislike about  is all the boy/boy pairing and this story is not one of them.

Okay! I guess said person didn't bother to see I have written that too, ohNOES.

Join the Doctor/Rose friending meme, if you want

Meanwhile, everyone is of course talking about this devolpment in the UK. Ack.

In other news:
UN attacks Lebanon aid 'disgrace'
German town fights 'neo-Nazi' bid on local hotel
World Trade Center film released
Jostein Gaarder makes attack on Israel. Many are not amused. (I know I'm not.)
Norwegian cricketers defied protestors.

Comments

[freezer818.livejournal.com]

At least the UN guy is bashing Israel and Hezbollah, instead of the usual "Everything is Israel's fault" that seems to be so trendy.

[doyle_sb4.livejournal.com]

Women throwing round these sorts of words about other women make me see red, I swear to god *is feeling wanky today*

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Yeeee-eees. It's from your own you will get it, as we say in Norway.

[spotts1701.livejournal.com]

Meanwhile, everyone is of course talking about this devolpment in the UK. Ack.

Yeah, here in the U.S. all flights coming in from the U.K. are currently on terror alert "Red" (most severe) and all domestic flights are on terror alert "Orange". All liquids (except necessary medicines) are being confiscated at the security checkpoints and at least one state has called out the National Guard to assist at their airports.

Of course the President made his "this is because Islamic fanatics hate our freedoms" speech again this morning, while I suspect Karl Rove and his "boiler room" team are trying to figure out how to hang the "Democrats are soft and weak" meme on this incident so that they can try to recover lost momentum before the elections in November.

[cheesygirl.livejournal.com]

Poor Martha. I'm really feeling sorry for that actress having to deal with the ROSEISTEHDOCTORS1TWOOWUV11!1!!1! contingent. Jeez, people, give the girl a chance! All we've seen is photos and a vague description of the character. We don't know what sort of person she is or what sort of chemistry they'll have or how shippy or non-shippy they'll be. People are jumping to conclusions and insulting her and she hasn't even done anything yet but pose in front of a camera! Fully and stylishly clothed btw, dressed by the show's stylist, and I imagine told how to stand and how to look. She in no way looks whorish or bitchy to me. Yeesh! Chill pill, people. Use it. Learn to love it.

I'm Martha indifferent at the moment and will make up my mind whether I like her or not once I've seen her on the show. I really liked Rose but I like the Doctor more, so I'm mainly watching it for him.

[hippydeath.livejournal.com]

Ick, I had a huge long rant about women and sexual slurs but it got long and rambly so I'll spare you.
Needless to say I am Martha neutral until I see the new series, and don't think she looks whore-ish or chavvy at all.

These fandom people scare me.

[aervir.livejournal.com]

Thank you for this little speech!

I really hate it when either a female character is bashed with sex-related insults or, even worse, when users start attacking each other personally by flinging either "You whore/slut/tramp/bitch/cunt!" or "You fat fugly virgin/prude/frigid cow!" at one another. Bleargh.

[solielle.livejournal.com]

I lack coherancy on the issue of sexual insults (because they fill me with weariness and aggravation) but GAH. Can we maybe stop making judgements on a character we haven't met yet? Please? Especially when the judgements are based on a shiny leather jacket (which actually looks pretty cool, but also squeaky, and I hate it when clothes squeak)?

Seriously, all the flinging around of whore/slut/fat cow/whatthefuckever between women is just...it doesn't help, is all I'm saying. GAH.

[sc-angel72.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I'm much too sleep-deprived to have said that nearly as coherently, but it is exactly what I was thinking!

[jessickuh.livejournal.com]

I laugh because the reviewer made fun of "poeple" that "can not" spell. Kudos to that reviewer. *snicker*

[adele-leah.livejournal.com]

What I'm still trying to figure out how the HELL that outfit can even be considered "whoreish"?! WTF. My CHRISTIAN mother was pretty strict about what I could/couldn't wear and the outfit Martha's wearing is something that she would have probably SUGGESTED I wear.




Has anyone else notice gem_pinkeh's icon? Strikes me as the wrong one to use when calling someone a whore...

[fannishnonsense]

*applauds*

[shandydann]

I hate it when girls use the "w" word. I think Martha looks stylish.

The way the shots have been done Martha looks like she'll give the doctor a run for his money. Which I feel he needs. I think she's been dressed tastefully.

I wish the fangirls would give her a chance, although given the fact that it was on time and chips I'm not really surprised. At least the Who fandom isn't as batshit insane as HP or CSI.

As for the UK if they still have these restrictions in place in November I'm going to Belgium on the ferry.

[reia.livejournal.com]

Your icon has mesmerized me. *stare*

[losseniaiel.livejournal.com]

That entire thread on Martha brings me to the conclusion that some of the people there are in dire need of a sense of proportion.

[freezer818.livejournal.com]

Heh... I never thought of the ol' "Dems are soft" spiel as a meme before...

[cbackson.livejournal.com]

Oy. The best bit about that piece of lovely idiocy was the, "Well, where I come from if someone had her hair up like that we'd say she was a bit of a whore."

Little did I know that I need to consider the sexual signals given by my hair style...

[dalinae.livejournal.com]

Oh great. Those idiots are going to try to milk it at least till November and my flight to Frankfurt is going to be even more of a pain than it should be.

Hehe, "Democrats are soft and weak" meme.

[dalinae.livejournal.com]

See, Rose's choice of appearance, at first look, wasn't all that classy. It's not like she wore a black dress and a string of pearls. And she kinda had Carrie Bradshaw roots in some episodes. But people adored her because she's made of pure awesome. Can't they just have faith the writers are going to be just as nice to Martha (and from what I've seen from the latter, there is nothing specific that catches my eye)?

[mthespinner.livejournal.com]

I really don't get- the outfit the young woman was wearing was very tasteful...I guess I am getting old....


And I love defiant cricketers....

[robin-2370-hood.livejournal.com]

I will admit to using the w-word on one particular character, on a different show, but she did cheat on her husband with the main character, which made me mad. I try not to do that anymore.

[beck-liz.livejournal.com]

*facepalm* Geez. You know I'm not the least bit enthused about a new companion (unless it's a new old companion like Jack) but dude. Let's get real, here. I'm sure Martha will be fine once we get used to her. Chill out, people. (You're making us Rose fans look bad! Stop it!) Also, no one needs to be using that kind of language unless, as you say, Martha actually is one. *eyeroll*

[spotts1701.livejournal.com]

It is, watch:

[Democrats, Liberals, "People On The Other Side"] want [us out of Iraq, to make you less secure, to give the terrorists what they want] because [they don't love their country, they want the terrorists to win].
But [President Bush, Republicans] will make you safe by [staying the course in Iraq, standing up to al-Qaeda, fighting the terrorists there so we don't have to fight them here]. After all they are only fighting us because [they hate our freedoms, they are fanatics, they fear democratic change].

Mix and match as needed. Serves 12-15 wingnuts, unless you're on television.

[drakyndra.livejournal.com]

As a result of the whore thing, this poll has been prompted.

Because if you can't stop stupidity, you can make pointless sarcastic polls about it.

[glinda-penguin.livejournal.com]

*head-desks* the poor girl she hasn't even had any screen time yet and already she's being mauled. *shrugs* However think of the obscene amounts of DT hate when he was cast...and how much he's loved now...a summer is a long time in fandom...Personally I'm a bit gutted they brought in some new girl rather than Jack but that doesn't mean she's evil/of low morals.

On the 'developments in the UK' lets just hope they double checked their evidence this time? I'm all for foiling plots to blow people up...so long as its not another scapegoat to cause EVEN MORE tension... (They route american military planes taking weaponary to Israel through our airports and expect there not to be 'extreme' reactions?) *head-desks repeatedly*

[hippydeath.livejournal.com]

I'll admitt I went 'eugh, a chav' when I first saw Rose, but I didn't let that get in the way of me watching it and eventually coming to love the character. Who knows, maybe I'll hate Martha for some whole other reason, but I won't know until it's been shown.

[meeta.livejournal.com]

I concur about the whole whore/cunt thing. If we're talking in societal terms, then I'm a whore, but I respect myself and my body and only do what feels good for me, and in my opinion that makes me a non-whore. I hate the word cunt, just in general. I don't know why, but it bugs me, especially when women use it for some reason.

[fondued-jicama.livejournal.com]

I hate the c word. It's one of those words where I really fight for MY freedom of what I'm forced to hear, regardless of others' perceived 'freedoms of speech.'

(Sure, they have freedom of speech, but though I don't have the freedom to hit them for it, I do have the freedom to use more subtle forms of retribution. Most people are simply too dumb to recognise that.)

Because, frankly, I'll say about anything but the c/f words. And it pisses me off when people use them around me anyways, knowing I dislike them. However, I do feel a strange kind of awe at 'fuck,' because it turns sex into a verb! How amazing! To sex, I sex, you sex, we sex? Doesn't work. That's... like... gender determination.

[spudzilla.livejournal.com]

I like the word "cunt" as a swear. For me the attraction is just how gutteral and foul it sounds. I generally use it when someone is particularly cruel or mean though.

I'm careful of audience when I use it though. I don't throw it around just anywhere. I use it in conversations with friends when I know they're okay with it. Occaisionally I use it my own journal when I'm very very angry.

On one hand, I believe that words and symbols have as much power as we give them. So I have very few that are taboo to me. On the other hand, I do recognize that they can be perceived as very powerful and painful to others, and I don't really like to hurt other people just for the hell of it. So I'm usually careful of audience.