The Idiocy, It Burnssss, Precious

[misscam]

"The president stressed we are not tents people."

So, let's sum up - the president of Zimbabwe, Robert Mugabe, starts operation "Drive Out Rubbish", wherein his government demolishes houses in the slum and dump people out in the villages to fend for themselves. Hundreds of thousands of people become homeless. The UN, a bit preoccupied with aid effort after the tsunami and the major earthquake, do offer to supply tents for the homeless. The Zimbabwe reply?

"The president stressed we are not tents people," said Mr Mugabe's spokesman George Charamba, arguing that other countries were getting more help.
"Tents just don't auger well with our culture... If the UN does not have enough money for permanent shelter let the little they have be used to augment what the government already has."

Well, gee, if they aren't tents people, maybe you should have thought about that before you bloody well destroyed their homes, you fucking idiot! Basically, the UN should rebuild what you tore down, huh Mugabe? Oh, I'm sure they'll just be ever so happy to, it's not like they have enough to do feeding the people you've made starve and suffer through misguided economic policy and more plain idiocy. Mugabe, you repulse me. You probably have a tent for a brain, given how much draft there's in there. Also, you're a Git.

Aaaaaargh. Idiots give me a headache.

Also, this fic is idiotic.

"Alright then, Rose Tyler, where do you want to go to?" smiled The Doctor.
"Oh, you just think your the best don't you!" smiled ninteen year old Rose Tyler.
"I am the best!" commented the Doctor, sulking.
"You wish!!" she replied. "The Titanic." she answered suddenly. "I want to see the royal Titanic."
The Doctor looked uncertain, however.
"Ok, we'll land the police box on land, and board the ship of dreams!!" he said, beaming away again.

Because what you really want to do when you board a ship that will famously sink (or, as the author called it, "hit the iceburg") is leave your time machine on land, oh yes. That's real smart.

God, the idiocy, it burnssssss everywhere. (Yes, I feel vaguely cranky now, how kind of you to notice.)

Comments

[lotus79.livejournal.com]

*pats*

[git-the-goddess.livejournal.com]

Just remember; guns don't kill stupid people, the bullets I put in the guns do!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

You'll need a lot of them.

[siraj.livejournal.com]

*offers a pair of AKS-74's with a few hundred clips of ammo each*

[git-the-goddess.livejournal.com]

Thanks! These'll be a good start!

[siraj.livejournal.com]

*jerks a thumb behind him at his pick-up, riding low from the weight of the ammo in the bed* got more in the back!

[adoraheatherly.livejournal.com]

Oh my. Your fandom and mine meet in the most horrible way.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Truly, a match made in iceburg.

If the author intends to basically re-enact parts of the Titanic movie with Rose and the Doctor, I will groan. And point and mock and headdesk. Because... No.

[greyladybast.livejournal.com]

I second that point/mock/headdesk and raise you a horrible murderous rage.

I didn't even read the whole fic. The excerpt read like a blatant rip-off of the beginning bit of "End of the World" anyway, so I'm not inclined to see what else got ripped off.

Gah, I know the Whoverse can be Mary-Sue friendly, but enough is fricken' enough, already!

[aervir.livejournal.com]

But there is already a Rose in "Titanic", and there's a Rose in "Doctor Who", so this just screams for a cross-over.

Well, maybe rather not. Somehow, I can't imagine Christopher Eccleston uttering the (in)famous "king of the world" quote.

[puredeadthingy.livejournal.com]

And a Jack. I remember this plotbunny being born in metaquotes...

[falena]

*headdesk to infinity*

You know what?In Italy we have a nice little proverb saying the mother of the fools is always pregnant. The problem is when those fools get to be the head of a nation...

[elvea-aure.livejournal.com]

What is all this ludicry? Are the President Git Awards to be held soon? Are all presidents in the world out on their 'best' behaviour now? Are they all stupid?


Need bleach. Poor brain.

Dealing with stupidity spirits.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

"All Aboard The Titanic!!"
And Rose and the Doctor stood, holding hands, staring at a ship at the words:
Liverpool, Titanic.


So entranced were they at the sight of the ship that they didn't see the life boat oar smack them upside the head. "OUT! OUT Spirits of STUPIDITY! OUT!" Alec cried wielding the oar like a bastard sword. Unfortunately he hit them a little too hard and they tumbled into the water. "...Oh... crap."

Verra shook her head with a sigh. "You need to watch how you wave those things," she said. The two of the bent down and pulled the unconscious Doctor and Rose from the water. Flailing in the water was the Author's spirit of Stupidity. Alec whacked it over the head with the oar a couple of times and it sank like the ... well guess.

"There, all better. They'll just wake up with a bit of a headache," Alec said cheerfully, "Do you think I could take the oar?"

"Why not, it's not like they'll miss it."

[chunkylimes.livejournal.com]

All this stupid makes widdle chunky cry. Please, think of the chunky.

[erhothwen.livejournal.com]

*head bang*

And not the good kind of rock concert mosh pit head bang, but the head bang against a desk kind.

[j0llipops.livejournal.com]

Jo's contribution to curing the crankiness of Cam -- annoying alliteration! And a gift. I got rather bored and spent a few minutes twiddling with the screencaps you sent me earlier. So here you are, though the text is rather fiddly:

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Aaaw. It's Sim-Doctor, being all cute.

I'm way too fond of alliteration, actually.

[childofares.livejournal.com]

Why, by all that is sparkly and shiny, did they not make preparations for hundreds of thousands of people BEFORE they destroyed thier homes? That's like demolishing a building but forgetting to let the workers inside or the owners of the building know. sheesh. Maybe he expects the UN to hand over the money from the "You are a moron and we will simply throw money at you so you go away" fund. I see your outrage and I raise you righteous indignation.

[j0llipops.livejournal.com]

Would just like to observe that I am completely in love with your icon.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Must be. Maybe he's thinking if he makes it horrid enough for his people, the UN will have to overlook the fact that he's a nasty ass dictator and fix it all. Grrr.

[silvery-lass.livejournal.com]

Why would the doctor go back to the Titanic? In "The End of the World" he said he had already been there?

Sometimes I wonder if certain fanfic writers have actually seen the series they are writing about or have just simply read others fanfics?

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I guess one icy dip was not enough.

Either that or they just don't think.

[git-the-goddess.livejournal.com]

"Author's Response: Thanks, by the way, the whole TARIDS issue is solved in the fourth Chapter, soz bout that!!
Author's Response: *TARDIS, not TARIDS"

So I looked:
"Doctor? Where's the TARDIS?" called Rose over roaring wind. The Doctor simply remained silent. Speaking finally.
"The TARDIS got left on dry land. You said you wanted to come on board, and we did, but I knew I couldn't land the TARDIS on a boat-too much of a giveaway, really. And so, what I did was left it there. I thought about the sinking but I didn't think it happened yet. So, I didn't bring the TARDIS, it's all my fault." Rose looked at him, and put a hand on his shoulder.
"No, no it's not your fault. It's mine, I got over excited about the Titanic, I forgot about it's sinking. If anybody's to blame it really ought to be me."
Urge to kill rising. I think i'm getting used to these homicidal urges.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

...

....

.....

THAT'S NOT RESOLVING IT YOU...!

Headache. Headdesk. Mouthalcohol.