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The CSI 'Wankimplosion' Drinking Game
as written by [livejournal.com profile] misscam and [livejournal.com profile] idreamedmusic
(with thanks to [livejournal.com profile] jessickuh for inspiration)


Have a sip when:

- A ship analogy is used - "the ship sails", "the ship has sunk", "the ship will hit an ice berg".
- "We still have fanfic".
- Sofia is referred to as 'the Spork'
- A shipname is flung around without being explained - Grillows, GSR, Sadle, Yobling, Hillbillies...
- CSI is declared to have jumped the shark

Have a drink when:

- A Nick/Sara shipper proclaims Nick and Sara have more "natural chemistry"
- Someone proclaims Grissom is like Sara's father
- Sara is declared to be unattractive, manly, a loser or similar
- Catherine is declared to get away with things Sara wouldn't with accusations of double standards
- Someone calls Sara an alcoholic
- A Cath/Gil shipper claims Catherine understands him better
- A bugname is used as a affectionate name - Sofia is "Grissom's Ladybug", Catherine is "Grissom'a Butterfly", Ecklie is "Hodges's Preying Mantis", etc.
- A ship is declared gross or disgusting
- A poster promises to throw up or declares to have thrown up already
- A poster declares she/he will never watch CSI again
- "CSI is dead to me"
- A GSR icon gloats about being Canon
- A Cath/Warrick shipper moans about this having supposed to be their ship's season
- Grissom is declared to be acting OOC
- A Grissom/Sara shipper actually types "squee" or "eee"
- Someone uses a picture of two actors as proof of their ship (Billy/Marg, Jorja/George)
- The "married couple" quote from TPTB on Grissom and Catherine is used by a shipper
- A poster claims to represent the view of the majority of the viewers
- A Grissom/Sara shipper feels cheated not to have seen the start of the relationship
- Grissom or Sara is declared having an unhealthy intrest in the other, like "stalking", "obsessing", by an opposing shipper.
- Babydoll abuses grammar while campaigning for Cath/Nick
- Eyesex gets mentioned
- A poster declares that if Sara hooks up with Grissom, she'd sink "so low" in the poster's esteem. Have another when the same gets tossed at Grissom.
- A song is applied to a ship
- Dido's "White Flag" is quoted
- A Grissom/Sara shipper calls another ship delusional
- A shipname gets mocked by an opposing ship
- A Personal Space Violation (PSV) is used as indication of a ship
- A Cath/Gil shipper declares Catherine's use of his first name as sign of true love. Also applies for some slash ships.
- The term UGLI is applied to anyone getting between the two people in your ship
- Invoking 'ships from other shows to strengthen yours though it has absolutely no bearing on it
- Someone declares Grissom incapable of emotion
- Praising a writer of a pro-ship episode and declaring a writer of a not so pro-ship episode to suck
- "They can't do this to us!"
- "Don't lose faith!"
- Use the multishipper excuse to at least have one of you diametrically opposed ships happening

Have two drinks when:

- Ratings are used to argue for or against a ship
- Fanfic is used to argue for or against a ship
- Tazzer says "Viva Gofia"
- A theory is presented on why Grissom/Sara won't last and the OP's ship will sail after all
- A poster claims Billy or Jorja is actually against GSR and was pressured into it
- A petition to beg TPTB to break Grissom and Sara up in season seven is launched
- A script is declared fanfic when it does nothing for your 'ship and of course it's info from a friend of a friend
- Grissom or Sara is declared a virgin
- "LH and Grissom are better suited since LH is much closer to his age" - despite MC being younger than JF in actual fact
- A Cath/Gil shipper makes a hint about Lindsey needing "a parternity test"
- An anti-GSR icon is used
- Nick and Sara are declared to "be like brother and sister"
- Babydoll compares Cath/Warrick to incest
- Cath/Gil shippers and Grissom/Sara shippers fight over which ship "owns" the butterfly symbol
- Spoilers for shippy scenes get written out as a script by someone other than the spoiler-poster.
- You make a dipshit out of yourself by constantly capitalizing things like "Our 'ship" or referring to the others as "That 'ship", like you're a holy order or something
- Acronyms get overused, for example: "The PSV in YGM so proved the UST between G/S that LH can go pee herself"
- A physical attribute of an actor is used to smack down a character - i.e Jorja's gapped teeth, or Marg's lips.
- Eyecandy factor of Young Turks is used in an argument of Grissom's lack of sexiness
- Writers for the show are counted in pro-ship or anti-ship camps
- A writer is bashed for writing an episode introducing a potential rival to the ship
- Poster goes on and on about the disgusting age different between Grissom and Sara, yet have no troubles lusting WP herself and finds nothing wrong with his marriage in real life
- A character not in your ship gets a "cute" nickname - Cath is called "slow-mo", for instance

Down the bottle when:

- CBS is declared homophobic for pushing a het ship
- A poster offers an elaborate theory on why Grissom and Sara are not together after all
- Babydoll writes a long letter to CM to help her see the light
- An actual declaration of shipwar is posted
- A fanfic rewriting the finale just to have the author's ship instead is posted
- A fanfic written just to bash a character is posted
- Jorja Fox is declared lesbian because she played one in ER
- Elaborate stories are invented to explain how Sofia's new necklace is a gift from Grissom, or how the plant in Sara's house is THE plant and how Nick and Greg are really gay despite having expressed interest in women

Throw a bottle on the poster when:

- A character's name gets misspelled

Feel free to add your own, and as ever, the Wankshelter bar is open and free for those who want to play.
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Date: 2006-05-12 04:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] idreamedmusic.livejournal.com
And I'm so the first one to test it. YAY!

Good think you got German beer in the wank shelter. ::huggles case of it in her corner::

Date: 2006-05-12 04:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] idreamedmusic.livejournal.com
Eeeeeeeeeeeeep, spelling rules. Typing think instead of thing.... not so much. I'm blaming it on me, uh, experimenting with the game. Yes.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] keskt.livejournal.com
Well... I never really liked my liver anyway, I guess. Bottoms up!

(erm, and what ship is "Hillbillies?")

Date: 2006-05-12 05:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] misscam.livejournal.com
Alcohol is the handy excuse for almost everything.

Bottom's up!

Date: 2006-05-12 05:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nymeria.livejournal.com
*Sighs* I'll be the wank-shelter's waitress, but if anyone gets really drunk off this game, I am so stealing their wallets before I roll 'em out the door. Just sayin'.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] misscam.livejournal.com
It's one name for Cath/Nick. It's also known as Cowpokes and something else I forget.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anitchka.livejournal.com
So ... I'm gonna be drunk for a while.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] misscam.livejournal.com
How... sneaky.

I approve.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yattara.livejournal.com
I'll help waitressing. And laugh at drunken antics.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:09 pm (UTC)

Date: 2006-05-12 05:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nymeria.livejournal.com
It's always good being the only sober one in a room full of drunk people, and with the tidbits you've posted before, I expect this game'll get the whole fandom drunk off their asses. :D

Date: 2006-05-12 05:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] keskt.livejournal.com
oh. that kind of makes me want to throw up (ONE DRINK YES!)Seriously, this drinking game basically highlights all the reasons why the CSI fandom is so wonderfully hilarious. So much good wank. Also? "Hodges's Preying Mantis" lmao!

Date: 2006-05-12 05:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] misscam.livejournal.com
Damn straight.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nymeria.livejournal.com
I've got the video recorder. How are you at blackmail? ♥

Date: 2006-05-12 05:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] misscam.livejournal.com
:) The game was carefully composed by reading wank, and hoo boy, the hilarity of it all can kill.

*hands you a drink*

Date: 2006-05-12 05:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] misscam.livejournal.com
Ooooh yeah. It's going to be a serious wankimplosion. They're wanky like hell now, and that's before the finale has aired!

It's going to be epic.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yattara.livejournal.com
I'm a fast learner.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nymeria.livejournal.com
After it's died down, I think I'm going to buy a beachhouse in California with my stolen hard-earned tips.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yattara.livejournal.com
And icon-love. I've only just gotten into the series.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nymeria.livejournal.com
Woohoo! Fortune here we come! :D

Date: 2006-05-12 05:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nymeria.livejournal.com
Firefly is love. I picked up the boxset for £18 in HMV end of last year, and had to order Serenity from the States. ^^;;

Date: 2006-05-12 05:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yattara.livejournal.com
And my other new fandom. *grins.*

I think I'll buy property in London, myself.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yattara.livejournal.com
Yes, it is. So much.

Date: 2006-05-12 05:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nymeria.livejournal.com
I'm a multi-fandom icon slut, what can I say. ;)

Heh, just make sure you dun pick one of the many grotty areas. Try Kent, it's prettier and doesn't have as many bloody pigeons D:

Date: 2006-05-12 05:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] smalldiver.livejournal.com
You know, I think I'll just get myself on the register on a new liver now, since it won't be long before I'll be needing a new one...

A shipname is flung around without being explained - Grillows, GSR, Sadle, Yobling, Hillbillies...

Um, huh? I get that Grillows is Grissom/Willows, but as for the other ones...
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