CSI Wank Watch, part the gazillion

[misscam]

CSI fandom is STILL wanking on. What fun. So, in honour of this new icon by dragonlp86, I give you yet another taste. With fanfic, too!

A Grissom/Catherine shipper manifesto is published and it's not happy about the GSR:
In Season 2, the producers began to write weak ‘geek’ scenes (sceneswith shipper Grissom/Sara content) based on the popularity of thepairing and sometimes these scenes backfire (notice the tone in whichPetersen pronounces the infamous ‘Since I’ve met you’ line in Burden OfProof)

Ass-pulling does not please the Snicker:
the GSR peeps say that its confirmed gris n sara are dating and like living together... i'd like to know where they pulled that from... i'm guessing their asses or out of thin air lol. everyone knows the same, and thats that the end scene was shit, stupid, didnt fit in, degrading to sara, and nausiating for everyone that can see and hear!!!
anyhu back onto snickers, man i'm pissed off agen now, i hate gsr argh.

A random moment of WTF:
well for me I dont believe in Alien because I'm a Christian and the bible says he created the galaxy NOT the Galaxy and the Aliens in the Galaxy but I suppose they could be out there I just dont personally believe they are *shrugs*

In case TPTB were counting...:
So - wow, does that make it final. We have been just pushed aside, rejected, discounted; our loyalty and enthusiasm for CSI counts for zero.I know that this will some people out there very happy; let the gloating begin.

TPTB, like your ex, in a way:
I really believe that CSI has been ruined for me. Everything that it was is now cast in a new light - one that I can't/won't accept. The implications of the finale are so far-reaching that they not only change the future of CSI, they have changed the past.This is the nature of betrayal, whether it is betrayal by a lover, a friend, whatever. It means that what you believed was not true. It calls everything into question.
It's now 8:49 PM. Can I really do it? Oh God. It's the one with Faye Dunaway. I loved it. But if I let myself watch, I'll just be all upset. I don't think I can look at Grissom now; he's been tainted, defiled, mutated.

Billy Petersen, now as a lyer:
She also just made William Petersen out to be a twofaced lyer, so many times in the past he said he didn't want arelationship it was about the drama and now he's one who wanted it.What about what he said about Grissom wanting to be a part of LadyHeather's life all lie's. And to think I admired that man and neverthough he would stab his fans in the back.

Snickers need no writers, apparently:
I guess I was just bitter. All these years (yes years, lol), I was so optimistic and hopeful, and I was flat out turned down. We all were (not trying to brain wash all you guys). Snicker is not dead. Sure, it may not be canon (hate that word, even if it's for my ship), but it's THERE, you know? The looks, the proximity....that's something Grissom and Sara can never have. Flirtings, proximity, and "chemistry" between Grissom and Sara have and are gonna have are given to them by the writers. It's an intricate procedure--GSR. It's like an exact calculation, whereas Snickers is something natural. And most of all, it's right.

Fanfics join the wank:

This is the ending how it SHOULD have been, is the short of it.

To her surprise, instead of giving her a kiss, he quoted, ’As Long As You’re Mine’ from ’Wicked’

Grissom leaned back in his chair and shook his head. “No. It can’t be mine,” he said. “That’s impossible.”

“So...you didn’t even kiss the whole time you two were dating? Not once?”

What if that hadn’t have been a dream? Did it really happen?

"I love you, but I'm not in love with you. That belongs to someone else, and that isn't going to change."

Drink up, my friends. The wankshelter bar is still open.

Comments

[yattara.livejournal.com]

Some people...Remedial writing-courses, stat.

*I know, but it keeps my mind off the stupid.*

And the Alien-poster...wonder if s.he also thinks the X-men are blasphemous?

[anitchka.livejournal.com]

It amuses me how that ship manifesto is basically, "The evidence for this ship is: I THINK IT'S AWESOME!"

[misscam.livejournal.com]

She. I haven't the foggiest. That's our dear SaraSidleSt(r)okes, my favourite wanker so far.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

See, if people would just be upfront about that instead of going on about how it's purer or more natural or whatever, I'd have a lot less to snigger at.

[velocityofsound.livejournal.com]

And there's always the point that THE OTHER ONE IS TOTALLY LAME.

[yattara.livejournal.com]

*wishes Harmonians'd adopt that.*

[dawning-star.livejournal.com]

By now I think all of us in the wankshelter need to requisition new livers.

Anyone up for making a blanket fort?

[kitness.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, a song fic based around a Rascall Flatta song, but also quoting showtuens? I may vomit over the fact that I have the same tast is music as the person who wrote that drivel. Ugh.

I'm disturbed, I need to take steel wool and bleach to my brain. Someone get me a stiff drink.

[dawning-star.livejournal.com]

I've got vodka.

[amichandrn.livejournal.com]

It's like, "Thank you for destroying a perfectly good song."

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I got pillows...?

[misscam.livejournal.com]

What's your poison? I got the lot.

And worry not, you'll get over. You run into those things when you read enough fanfic, and the shock does pass. Eventually.

[sekhmets-temple.livejournal.com]

While all the cast has brilliant chemistry with each other, and while I love--in theory--the idea of Warrick and Catherine having a fling--not a relationship, a fling--this is just the sort of thing that will erode the quality of a show.

CSI was never about shipping, IMO. It was about an interesting, slightly quirky group of crime scene invesigators in that wacky town called Las Vegas. Some of the crimes were weird, some were hilarious while others were nightmarish and that's what I tuned in to watch: crime scene investigation in Vegas and the excellent collective chemistry of the cast. In and around this we got a few glimpses into our investigators lives--enough for character development--and that was just great. It was perfect and that's why the show was number one for so long.

Now, CSI has finally jumped the shark. I'll keep watching, but I believe this is the beginning of the end.

[nostalgia-lj.livejournal.com]

scenes with shipper Grissom/Sara content

I don't know why, but that cracks me the hell up.

[freezer818.livejournal.com]

Meh, sez I. They won't last past their first big fight, making their mopey and awkward scenes at work, that much more awkward. ($10 says Gil's tasting Lady Heather's lash by midseason.)

[rhipowered.livejournal.com]

So...er...it's William Petersen's fault.

[ashiya.livejournal.com]

Is it going to be like, wank season all summer? o_O

[siraj.livejournal.com]

*shakily grabs a small bottle of absinthe, foregoing the shotglass, already having had his fair share of whiskey, rum, and jagermeister to not care*

Damn wankers... *takes a drink* and double damn them... sweet Anubis...

[evilstorm.livejournal.com]

After having actually watched what all this wank is about, I gotta say--fucking BATSHIT. That was less shippy than some of the NON-shippy scenes from my fandom, fer crying out loud. *facepalms*

...

*succumbs and grabs a bottle of brandy*

[everysecondtues.livejournal.com]

I am amazed at the sheer stamina the fandom displays.

*boggles*

[keskt.livejournal.com]

do you love her more than babydoll?

[lotus79.livejournal.com]

Wow, they're still wanking? I would have thought they'd've choked on their own splooge by now...

[jessickuh.livejournal.com]

And the Alien-poster...wonder if s.he also thinks the X-men are blasphemous?

Oh she better not touch my X-Men. Especially not my sexy, sexy hubby Wolvie.

[highwindpav.livejournal.com]

Since Jesus had this fondness for metaphor and telling stories with a moral point, I certainly hope any Christian with a brain would realize that X-Men aren't blasphemous as a fiction. Opinions may vary on the characters, but the idea? Pffft.

[highwindpav.livejournal.com]

whereas Snickers is something natural. And most of all, it's right.

Not when you're in the mood for a Kit-Kat. Or are deathly allergic to peanuts.

::takes a shot of vodka::

[yattara.livejournal.com]

They weren't in the bible, hence they're blasphemous.

Sense it doesn't make.

[hotpot8202.livejournal.com]

WTF at that Alien/Christianity comment? I'm too scared to click the link and see the context for a comment like that. :/

[shadowednavi.livejournal.com]

Seconded. >_o; Especially when that quoted showtune happens to be one of my favorite songs, period. **hands you some mindbleach**

[avonassac.livejournal.com]

I'm not reading this, I'm not reading this, I'm not reading this, I'm not reading this, I'm not reading this, I'm not reading this.

*waits*

Oh, saying the same thing over and over again doesn't magically make the wank dissappear. Must just make the wank build stronger because it's like every single point these people make is the same thing but with crappier grammar.

Can I just get a bottle of Vodka from you now rather than continuing to come back for more? Would make much more sense, and would probably get the job done far quicker. ;P

[highwindpav.livejournal.com]

No, sense it does indeed not make. I've heard of a few nutty Christians who think that way, but there ain't a lot of them. I don't like to say, "You, out of my religion!" but some people tempt!

[yattara.livejournal.com]

Hear hear.