Lollipop metaphores, GSR glorifying child abuse and other bits of WTFery

[misscam]

"When you have sex with a man, he unwraps your lollipop and sucks on it. It may feel great at the time, but, unfortunately, when he’s done withyou, all you have left for your next partner is a poorly wrapped,saliva-fouled sucker." What the effity eff?

E-mail I got in my inbox this morning via an e-mail group:
Please go to the following link and list your issues with this Grissom Sara match up..

Please do not think I have anything against the actor and actress who portray them , because I do not. I am a huge Jorja Fox fan, but I think the message they are sending out is wrong.

Age doesn't matter. please.. So if Grissom was 15 years older then Sara when she was 16 would he still have been age appropriate to date her because " Age does not matter " ?

I am so angry at the writers, producers, and who ever had the final say in this, for sending out the message to all victims of abuse that they are wrong for feeling violated because after all age should not matter, that I don't think I will be watching the show next year.

The link pointed to was this, where people are wanking away merrily.

GSR is glorifying child abuse? WHAT? This one is getting a reaction even out of me, seasoned wank watcher. Good grief.

And more wank!

SaraSidleStokes still thinks Canon is coming for Nick and Sara:
thats why most people Love this Ship (and people from other ships even admit that ITS the one that will be Canon later) its NOT Angsty I mean they might harbor feelings for eachother and Hide it but they Flirt with eachother to Its like they are Both trying to let the other Know exactly How they feel
I also think we'll Get our ship It might take some time But it will happen

Jackpot (the sheriff still think that cath is gil wife). For the love of god is soooo simple, he loves cath, no men calling some women his wife for nothing!!!!!!!!!! Even Scully in "Chinga" calls Mulder my partner, but Mulder call her SUNSHINE!!!!!

Satan did it:
Here is my new theory about the Bizarro World CSI that we were (mis)treated to in the finale. It was all part of The Apocalypse. Satan did it. He took possession of formerly smart people and hijacked their brains. He planned this, thinking, "Hmmm. What could I do on earth to send my message that there is a new world order and I am now in charge? What would be the best way to get the attention of billions of people, subliminally getting to them? Aha! I've got it. I'll use CSI - the most watched TV show on the planet. I'll have them write a finale that is completely off base, out of kilter, amiss and offensive. I'll replace that despicable Grissom guy, all decent and moral and high minded, and replace him with his opposite - hee hee, it will baffle the humans! I'll show him in sunlight, relaxed, dressed down, behaving in a self revealing way. They'll barely recognize him and they'll know that their universe has changed - something is very wrong! Then, I'll use Sara - she's one of mine anyway - to lure him. That will really have them scratching their heads. While they're all confused and distracted, fighting about the finale of this TV show, I'll be busy taking over. It's such a wonderfully evil plan! I can hardly wait! Bwahaha!!
See? It's the only way to make sense of it all.

Billy's given up the good fight!!!!!1:
To fit Grissom into the required hero it was necessary to bring him down to the level of the fanfic Grissom, Sara's puppy dog. Hence that weird scene, Grissom's new behavior, and all the rest.
Blame it on the new order. It really is 'The Grissom and Sara Show" now and probably will be in Season Seven. The only thing I can't figure out is why Billy, who has always maintained such a high standards ever went along with it. Unless, as Lisa ?) suggested. The shirt and his wooden delivery at the end was an expression of just how he really feels. He has already said he's stopped fighting for a lot of things about the show.

Tazzer thinks the shirt says it all:
Lisa if I may expand on your Billy thoughts with this - I say that awful shirt (which in fact is his own personal one and is cute on Billy but not Gil) is a VISUAL statement of what he might really think of the show - it's a JOKE. Could Billy have been hinting to fans that indeed this was not the real Griss we have come to know and love, but rather a cartoon character that is now the butt of endless jokes. Billy is a rebel for sure so I would not put it pass him to get a dig in the best way he could at the moment in time.

Tazzer thinks it's all about the hotness:
Okay, I'll agree 110% - two people that look hot together, have hot chemistry together, and have hot qualities that bring out the other persons hot qualities is so very HOT that hell yes they should be a couple to get naked and grow old together.
And when I'm Queen of the world Gilbert & Sofia will be together solving crimes by night and getting naked and making love by day - so it is said, so let it be written, so let it be done.

'GSR Kills' gets fan-arted

Can you imagine getting this e-mail from someone who plagiarised your stories? WTF, dude. What the eff.

Comments

[dune-drd.livejournal.com]

I want a lollipop now. Thank you, will go and buy one, now

[nostalgia-lj.livejournal.com]

My boy lollipop, you made my heart go giddy-up...

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Mmmm, lollipops.

[hadria.livejournal.com]

While all those are hilarious, what I continuously find the most funniest is that Tazzer calls Grissom GILBERT. As if it's some sort of pet name for his ninety-inch dick and awesome baby-eating prowess, and he signs all his memos to Ecklie with little flowers and hearts over all the i's in Gilbert Grissom, entomologist.

so it is said, so let it be written, so let it be done.

LOL

[misscam.livejournal.com]

If a guy named his penis 'Gilbert', I would never let it anywhere my vagina. I have some standards.

Tazzer has weird ownership issues over Grissom. Seriously.

[oddlyfamiliar.livejournal.com]

Wow. So disturbed by the lollipop stuff. That's just... wrong.

The CSI Wank is as amusing as ever. I love reading your posts, cause I get to laugh at the wank, instead of having to flail around in it.

And the plagiarism thing cracked me up - I mean srsly? She was doing it in order to keep her bloke?! That's just not even funny...

[misscam.livejournal.com]

If I was trying to keep my bloke, I think I would try better ways than nicking fanfic.

[miss-andromache.livejournal.com]

I will never look at a lolliepop the same way.

PS, just finished watching "Rose". You lot suck, I want to watch them all now ;)

[boz4pm.livejournal.com]

PS, just finished watching "Rose". You lot suck, I want to watch them all now ;)
Ha! *cackles* Another victim Yay!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

BWHAHAHAHAH.

Another one luuuuuured in.

[stlchik512.livejournal.com]

I read that "e-mail" about seven times. Either I am completely illiterate, or that is one incoherant jumble of words.

Between bad!fic and wank, I've forgotten what real writing looks like. Someone save me!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Um. Reread some of your favourite fanfics that are good? By good writers?

It does wonders for restoring faith in writing.

[teenwitch77.livejournal.com]

The world scares me.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

People scare me.

[boz4pm.livejournal.com]

*blinks @ the e-mail* Er... What? She knew it was happening and now pleads ignorance? And what's with the 'oh, woe, hurt me and hurt me good' stuff? Grah - what IS it with trolls and interweb gits that they need to pile on the 'oh, I've been so BAD, you must skin me alive and boil me in oil, woe, woe, thrice woe'? It instantly makes any half-assed apology seem, well, half-assed and completely insincere.

Not that I have anyone in particular in mind, you understand. ¬_¬

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Seems to be a way to get people to say 'no, it wasn't that bad' and thus get more easily off?

I agree though, it makes it sound completely insincere and just drama drama.

[yattara.livejournal.com]

How does a relation between two consenting adults constitute child-abuse? Talk about scraping the barrel for something to bitch about.

And the email about plagiarism just floors me. But I'm easily astonished these days.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

But see, he's lived over ten years longer than her, so he was an adult when she was a child! That's abuse, that is!

... nevermind they didn't know each other then, of course.

My lollipop?

[amichandrn.livejournal.com]

Sounds like someone had a nasty accident with a lollipop when he was younger and is using it to describe why he fears the vagina.

1) I share lollipops with my friends all the time. It's just spit.
2) My vagina is in no way, shape or form a lollipop. Someone needs to go back to school for some basic anatomy.
3) Stop trying to oversimplify things.
4) Stop assuming that teens are total morons. Partial morons, maybe, but TOTAL morons? No.
5) In fact, just stop talking. Please. For the good of the next generation.

FEAR MY LOLLIPOP!!!!!!

Re: My lollipop?

[misscam.livejournal.com]

But both the vagina and the lollipop should get a licking now and then.

(I am looking at you, males. Learn.)

[anitchka.livejournal.com]

Satan did it:

Excuse me, I did not.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

You're Satan now?

[falena]

*drive-by comment*

Did you hear this? It's hilarious, especially the last 30 seconds!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I have once before, yes.

Mmmm, David Tennant's voice.

[marcasite.livejournal.com]

God I missed you and your links to the best.wank.ever!

The email is like O_o to me. Her grammer is unbelieveable and can you imagine her greatest concern is not that she stole but that "her man" will find out she is a thief! Eek!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I feel loved, I think.

And of all concerns I've heard from plagiarists, that one is the weirdest yet, yes.

[kittycatness.livejournal.com]

Wank.
Ew.
It burns.

And my opinion may not matter because I am a teenager and would consider dating someone fifteen years older than me, but age doesn't matter. If you find it in your heart to love someone, you should. I'm not saying "GO HAVE SEX WITH THEM!" (I have issues with sex that aren't based on religion) but the best thing you can do with or for someone is to love. That may be corny and stupid, but it's completely true.

And the lolipop analogy was not the best they could have used. I've heard the wedding cake one (every time you have sex with someone, you hit the wedding cake with a bat, and if/when you decide to get married/commit yourself, what you give them is crumbs).
(It didn't help that the guy telling us this was probably one of the most realistically-delicious religious guys I've ever seen.)



Anyway.
Was "Parting of the ways" (1/13) the last episode for season one? Yes, right?
And I'm about to watch "The Christmas Invasion" on youtube.
Yay for Doctor Who.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Yes, it was the last one of the first series. The Christmas Invasion is sort of between seasons, and then "New Earth" is the first of the second series.

When it comes to sex, as long as it's involving consenting adults, I don't feel any urge to condem anyone else's way of doing or not doing it. Sometimes, morality for me is what you don't make moral judgements on too.

[velocityofsound.livejournal.com]

I say that awful shirt (which in fact is his own personal one and is cute on Billy but not Gil)

It's like Superman - once he puts on the costume, no one can even tell the difference.

And of course, I'm continually amused by people NOW having a huge problem with WP advocating this kind of age difference in a relationship... as his wife in real life is younger than Jorja Fox by several years, and he started dating her when she was younger than me. Sorry guys, Strike One. Try again.

[despertarse.livejournal.com]

So what do men have? Popsicles? And when you suck a popsicle, all that's left is a melting popsicle and colored lips.

[burnmybody.livejournal.com]

Mmmmmlollipops. Considering my friends and I share those as well as gum...
...Whole new set of pervy jokes, yay!

*runs far, far away from the CSI fandom*

[nenya_kanadka]

To cheer you up:



And I have now spent several hours reading links about virginity and sex ed because of that link you quoted. Now I must sleep. *realizes this is an ev0l plot to get me on Norwegian time* Darn you, Cam!!11!1 :D

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Oh, that's fab! Did you make it? Can I snag?

I am evil, clearly.

[chicklet73.livejournal.com]

Hee. "Saliva-fouled sucker"

I can't wait to use that, somewhere. On someone. Muahahaha. Fear me, world.

[jessickuh.livejournal.com]

I've only very recently learned about the crazy that is Tazzer from you. Nonetheless, her posts/comments/opinions make me throw up in my mouth. Yeah, I can feel the stomach acid now.