BWHAHAHA! and other things not so funny
Jul. 19th, 2006 01:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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maureenlycaon
John W. Bradshaw, plaintiff vs. Unity Marine Corporation Inc.; Coronado, in rem; and Phillips Petroleum Company, defendents (Or here, if you prefer a .html version.)
The fun starts on page two: Before proceeding further, the Court notes that this case involves two extremely likable lawyers, who together have delivered some of the most amateurish pleadings ever to cross the hallowed causeway into Galveston, an effort which leads the Court to surmise but one plausible explanation. Both attorneys have obviously entered into a secret pact -- complete with hats, handshakes and cryptic words -- to draft their pleadings entirely in crayon on the back sides of gravy-stained paper place mats, in the hope that the Court would be so charmed by their child-like efforts that their utter dearth of legal authorities in their briefing would go unnoticed. Whatever actually occurred, the Court is now faced with the daunting task of deciphering their submissions. With Big Chief tablet readied, thick black pencil in hand, and a devil-may-care laugh in the face of death, life on the razor's-edge sense of exhilaration, the Court begins . . .
And goes on. I was laughing silly by the end of it. GOLD.
Fic progress: 6000+ words and rambling on. Might post it in parts, I'm thinking. So will need a beta. Any volunteers? Could be a bit long in the end, so you're hereby warned.
In other news, the ship hired by Norwegian Foreign Affairs makes it to Cyprus. As it turned out, it carried out over 100 Norwegians from Lebanon, and over 1000 others. Thumb's up for helping other nations out. Back in Lebanon, over 40 have been killed by Iraeli raids, mostly civilians. As war goes, that's just like it always is. Speculation on Israel's strategy. So really looks like this isn't going to get better any time soon.
Sigh.
maureenlycaonJohn W. Bradshaw, plaintiff vs. Unity Marine Corporation Inc.; Coronado, in rem; and Phillips Petroleum Company, defendents (Or here, if you prefer a .html version.)
The fun starts on page two: Before proceeding further, the Court notes that this case involves two extremely likable lawyers, who together have delivered some of the most amateurish pleadings ever to cross the hallowed causeway into Galveston, an effort which leads the Court to surmise but one plausible explanation. Both attorneys have obviously entered into a secret pact -- complete with hats, handshakes and cryptic words -- to draft their pleadings entirely in crayon on the back sides of gravy-stained paper place mats, in the hope that the Court would be so charmed by their child-like efforts that their utter dearth of legal authorities in their briefing would go unnoticed. Whatever actually occurred, the Court is now faced with the daunting task of deciphering their submissions. With Big Chief tablet readied, thick black pencil in hand, and a devil-may-care laugh in the face of death, life on the razor's-edge sense of exhilaration, the Court begins . . .
And goes on. I was laughing silly by the end of it. GOLD.
Fic progress: 6000+ words and rambling on. Might post it in parts, I'm thinking. So will need a beta. Any volunteers? Could be a bit long in the end, so you're hereby warned.
In other news, the ship hired by Norwegian Foreign Affairs makes it to Cyprus. As it turned out, it carried out over 100 Norwegians from Lebanon, and over 1000 others. Thumb's up for helping other nations out. Back in Lebanon, over 40 have been killed by Iraeli raids, mostly civilians. As war goes, that's just like it always is. Speculation on Israel's strategy. So really looks like this isn't going to get better any time soon.
Sigh.
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no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 12:48 pm (UTC)Is this an actual law report (ie. handed down by the court?) because if it is...well, I wish I had cases to read like this for my law units :)
"it's as almost as if Plaintiff's counsel chose the opinion by throwing long range darts at the Federal Reporter"
"In either case, the Court caution's Plaintiff's counsel not to run with a sharpened writing utensil in hand - he could put his eye out." -- best footnote EVER.
Love this. It totally made my day.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 12:55 pm (UTC)I know, it's brilliant. I think I have a crush on this judge just from reading this. Sense of humour for the win!
no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 02:51 pm (UTC)If I ever rise to the dizzying heights of a judge, I want to put out a judgement like that :)
I love your icon, by the way. We finally get season two over here in Australia now, and I am eagerly rubbing my hands in anticipation of School Reunion.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 01:24 pm (UTC)-A
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Date: 2006-07-19 01:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 01:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 02:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 02:47 pm (UTC)Seriously though, your call. I have the time, but if you're more comfortable with someone else, don't hesitate to say so.
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Date: 2006-07-19 04:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 04:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 05:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 05:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 06:36 pm (UTC)Dreams_of_Him responds...
Date: 2006-07-19 07:35 pm (UTC)I'm in love with this judge, I am.
Re: Dreams_of_Him responds...
Date: 2006-07-20 04:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 09:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-20 04:25 am (UTC)