Fanfic Updates, Tarantino's C/W Shippyness and The Tale of Cam & the Roleplayer

[misscam]

Double East of the Sun, West of the Moon update for you, darlings. Much gratitude to chaoticmatter for the beta job she did and for briasoleil for the job she's now doing. Chocolate for both. And chocolate for me. You can read the chapters here (CSI Forensics) and here & here (ff.net). Ch. 20 is a little Cath/Warrick, with Nick not being too happy, while ch. 21 is Sara/Grissom smut.

Speaking of shippery things - my little C/W shipper heart went "Heeello!" as I watched Gary's "exclusive interview" on CBS here and Quentin Tarantino says to Gary and Marg while shooting "and I saw the picture of you and Warrick together in your office and I was like oh, are you a couple now on the show..." (some laughter and gestures) Quentin, are you a little C/W shipper? Come out of the closet! (And aha! Catherine does have a picture of herself and Warrick in her office!)

So I get IMed the other day by someone wanting to "roleplay". I wasn't all that stoked, but I decided to go along with it for the amusement factor. And thus, I invite you to behold the joy of Cam & the Roleplayer, a thrilling tale in all of one part of medical impossibilities and single tears. Names have been replaced to cover the AIM screen-names, who must be weeping in a corner somewhere. (You'll also note that Cam makes an attempt to be some-what in character and after a while gives up on pointing out impossibilities.)

Roleplayer: Hi i got your name off of your tax dollars at work
misscam hello
Roleplayer: how r ya
misscamI'm pretty good. Did you want something in particular, or just wanted to chat?
Roleplayer: Well do u like to roleplay and if not i can teach you its SUPER EASY
misscam you mean online roleplay?
Roleplayer: yea right here by instant message
misscam well, I haven't exactly done it by IM before and not quite sure what kind of roleplay you mean
Roleplayer: Which shows do u watch
misscam CSI, some Norwegian ones, Forensics Detectives, Law&Order
Roleplayer: OK do you like anyone as a couple on csi and which law and order
misscam sure. I like Grissom&Sara and Catherine&Warrick. Original L&O, sometimes Criminal Intent
Roleplayer: OK do you want me to teach you how to roleplay it is so easy i can teach ya
misscam what kind of roleplay exactly?
Roleplayer: well there is nc-17 which u are probably against right
misscam if you mean will I cyber with you via "roleplay", the answer is no. I get my kicks elsewhere, thanks
Roleplayer: NO thats not what i mean
Roleplayer: im 15 years old thats gross
Roleplayer:: and im female
misscam let's just say I've had males try some similar stuff, hence why I asked
Roleplayer: yea and its just a roleplay with kissing and THATS ALL
misscam okay...
Roleplayer: Now which couple do u wanna do from csi grissom/sara or catherine or warrick
misscam the latter, I guess
Roleplayer: Huh
Roleplayer: which couple is that
misscam the last one, the latter. Catherine and Warrick
Roleplayer: Oh ha ha ha i never knew they referred to them like that
Roleplayer: and do u wanna be catherine or warrick
misscamWarrick, I guess. Him being on my AIM avatar and all
Roleplayer: ok then when u talk u do just this
Roleplayer: u get that
misscam get what?
Roleplayer: ok when you are doing a roleplay you talk like this
misscam like a normal IM?
Roleplayer: ya
misscam right
Roleplayer: ok and when you do an action you do this
Roleplayer: *punches wall*
misscam yep
Roleplayer: you want me to start
misscam sure
Roleplayer: *catherine walks into work she had divorced eddie and she is having a hard time with him and she is really tied*
Roleplayer: *tired*
misscam *Warrick spots Catherine* Hey, you all right?
Roleplayer: Just very very tired*she says and she is sick*
misscam You don't look too good to me
Roleplayer: *she offers a small smile and she sits down quickly feeling sick*
misscam Want some coffee? *gestures towards the pot*
Roleplayer: Sure*she says quietly and she coughs really bad*
misscam *pours a coffee and hands her the mug* You really don't look good, you know. Maybe you should take the day off
Roleplayer: Maybe i should*she says and turns a few shades whiter*
misscam *takes her hand* Cath, I think you might need a doctor
Roleplayer: *she looks at him and drops her mug and her fever went sky high and she passes out*
misscam Catherine! *calls out in the hall* Someone call an ambulance!
Roleplayer: *she lays there and she cries out in pain because her body hurts
misscam *continues to hold her hand* Someone get that damn ambulance! Cath, where does it hurt?
Roleplayer: *she holds her chest because she has breast cancer*
misscam wow - timeout. Cancer doesn't quite work like that, I think. Fever and passing out?
Roleplayer: *yea but she is sick on top of cancer and she had it for a while but she didnt know*
Roleplayer: *thats why i had it all that way*
misscam hmhmm. Well, Warrick checks her pulse, presumably, and waits for the ambulance
Roleplayer: *she lays there and looks at warrick and says* Hurts
misscam I know, babe. Just breathe.
Roleplayer: *she chokes and she lays there and her eyes close*
misscam Oh God, Catherine! *checks pulse* Don't you do this to me!
Roleplayer: *her pulse stops and she lays there and she has a single tear fall down*
misscam *tries CPR*
Roleplayer: *she comes back and her eyes open slowly*
misscam *ambulance has arrived*
Roleplayer: *she lays there and says* Dont leave warrick*she slurrs*
misscam I'm not going anywhere
Roleplayer: *she looks at him and lets her eyes close*
misscam *he holds her hand as she gets lifted onto a gurney and wheeled into the ambulance*
Roleplayer: *she lays there and holds his hand and she feels pain all over*
misscam It'll be better soon, I promise. Just stay with me
Roleplayer: I cant it hurts so bad*she says and lets tears fall down*
misscam Yes, you can. You're a strong woman. I've always loved that in you
Roleplayer: *she looks at him and smiles*
misscam That's better. It'll be all right
Roleplayer: *she holds his hand and jumps because the pain radiates threw her body*
misscam (through, not threw) We're almost there now *ambulance stops*
Roleplayer: **sorry lol*
Roleplayer: *she lays there and says* Make it stop warr.....*she stops breathing*
misscam No! *ambulance people preform CPR, Warrick watches helplessly*
Roleplayer: *she lays there and she is rushed to surgery immediately*
misscam *Warrick waits in the waiting room, pacing back and forth*
Roleplayer: *its two hours later and she opens her eyes and sees no one*
misscam *Warrick is still begging to be let in to see her*
Roleplayer: *she looks at him and tries to talk*
misscam What is it? You want some water?
Roleplayer: Home*she says quietly*
misscam I'm sorry, the doctor wants to keep you here for observation. You'll be home soon
Roleplayer: *she frowns and says* Damn doctors
misscam Yes, but they saved your life today
Roleplayer: I know but i hate this place*she says quietly*
misscam I know, I know. But I'll be here. It'll be okay
Roleplayer: *she smiles and sits there and holds his hand*
misscam why didn't you tell us you'd been feeling bad before now?
Roleplayer: I dont know i ignored it
misscam You gave us quite a scare
Roleplayer: *she looks down and whispers* Sorry
misscam It's okay. Just don't do it aagin. You'll make me an old man
Roleplayer: You an old man hun come on you are young and sexy
misscam *he laughs softly* That sounds more like the Catherine I know
Roleplayer:: *she blushes8
Roleplayer: *
misscam Now you just have to get well and kick ass again
Roleplayer: yea
Roleplayer: i guess i gotta
misscam Wouldn't have it any other way
Roleplayer: *she smiles and look at him and she watches him move closer*
misscam If you want to sleep, I'll stay close, make sure you don't dream too bad, huh?
Roleplayer: Sure*she says and is tempted to kiss him*
misscam *kisses her forehead*
Roleplayer: *she smiles and pulls him close and she kisses him on the lips*
misscam *is caught by surprise and pulls back slightly* Cath... I didn't know you felt like this
Roleplayer: *she blushes and says* I have felt this way for a long time
misscam So have I
Roleplayer: *she looks at him and she strokes his cheek gently*
misscam When you get better, how about I take you out somewhere? Just me and you and no hospital?
Roleplayer: *she smiles and says* Sounds good to me
misscam It's a date. Now, you sleep. Need your rest, you know
Roleplayer: I dont wanna rest*she pretends to whine*
misscam And what can I do to change your mind?
Roleplayer: I dont know*she says grinning*
misscam How about a kiss?
Roleplayer: *she smiles and nods her head* Sounds good
misscam *gives her a soft kiss*
Roleplayer: *she smiles and goes right to sleep*
misscam *smiles* Sweet dreams, Cath.
Roleplayer:*she goes to sleep and wakes up the next morning really sore*
misscam *Warrick is asleep in the chair*
Roleplayer: *she looks at him and laughs quietly*
misscam *wakes up* Oh... Hey. You're awake
Roleplayer: *she laughs and says* Yes i am awake
misscam Feeling better?
Roleplayer: Alittle bit
misscam Told ya sleep would be good for you. You want a glass of water or something?
Roleplayer: No thanks
misscam The doctor will be in to see you soon
Roleplayer: *she frowns and says* I wanna go home now
misscam he has to check you up first, honey. Then I can take you home
Roleplayer: *she scowls and makes a pouty face*
misscam Come on, you can do it for me. Ah, here he is *doctor enters*
Roleplayer: *she smiles and sits there and listens to the doctor*
misscam *Warrick smiles and heads out for a moment, returning when the doctor has left*
Roleplayer: *she sits there and says* I CAN GO HOME
misscam I'll be happy to take you home, then
Roleplayer: *she smiles and gets up slowly and gets her clothes on quickly*
misscam *Warrick waits* Feeling good?
Roleplayer: Yes*she smiles and walks slowly*
misscam *offers a supporting arm*
Roleplayer: Thanks*she takes it and squeezes his arm and laughs*
misscam You are definitely feeling better
Roleplayer: *she smirks and says* Maybe i am
Roleplayer: *listen i will b back in 10 min im gunna showeR*
misscam All righty

After this she has IMed me every day, wanting to roleplay. I'm considering blocking her for a while, just to have some peace. Oy vey.

Comments

[sinneahtes.livejournal.com]

Note to self: do not read stuff like that role play after having no sleep, and while drinking yet another can of Cherry Coke. My lungs do not enjoy having to cough up a carbonated beverage, either from amusement or from a "Wha-?!" reaction.

*she holds her chest because she has breast cancer*

Heh... my alphabet has been reduced to the letters "WTF" here... those must have been some magical, cancer-curing kisses near the end?

I don't know whether I'd be more amused or creeped out if I found myself in that conversation. ^_^;

[huinesoron.livejournal.com]

Well, of course. Kisses Cure Cancer. Well known slogan.

... what, you mean it /isn't/? Well, bang goes my life plan...

[maureenlycaon.livejournal.com]

My deepest sympathies. *offers vodka and marzipan*

[misscam.livejournal.com]

*takes and chucks down*

Aaaah...

[briasoleil.livejournal.com]

I'd read the im, but I'm partial to my brain staying within the confines of my skull and not dribbling out of my ears. So. Sorry.

Also, it was totally my pleasure to beta for you. I'm glad that I didn't suck.

Heh. When my computer isn't being tortured into downloading myriad VM episodes at once, I will watch the GD interview. Cause, funny. Also, he's, like, way hot. Any chance he was partially nekkid?

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Alas, I fear he was fully clothed. But still hot. Mmm, Gary.

You didn't suck at all :) Thank you again. And your brain, for not dribbling out. Poor brain.

[fixing.livejournal.com]

LMFAO.

*she holds her chest because she has breast cancer*

[chem-nerd.livejournal.com]

Somehow, I think I would have been able to tell she was 15 even if she hadn't mentioned it...
That kid seriously needs to get a life.

[teenwitch77.livejournal.com]

Hah! That was incredibly amusing. Personally, my favorite part was -

Roleplayer: Now which couple do u wanna do from csi grissom/sara or catherine or warrick
misscam the latter, I guess
Roleplayer: Huh
Roleplayer: which couple is that?

But the breast cancer thing? WTF? Lol. Poor Cam.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I suffer so that the rest of you may be amused.

[rose-noire.livejournal.com]

Roleplayer: *she holds her chest because she has breast cancer*

LMFAO. hahahahaha. That whole thing was really funny. ^_^

And YAY for Tarantino secretly being a C/W shipper!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

We must get him to be involved in more CSI eps.

[puredeadthingy.livejournal.com]

There are no words...the breast cancer thing was funny. The 'latter? Which is that one?' part was comedy gold. When that kind of thing happens to me I mess with their heads by pretending to be a cat or something. Yes, I'm odd...

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Maybe I should have aimed for being a moose.

[kittycatness.livejournal.com]

Oh. My. Word. She's fifteen (assuming they're truthful) and is using net-speak. For the love of humanity. She's older than I am and refuses to type properly.

Roleplaying... used to do that. I didn't think anyone used the "star-action" format anymore. But I suppose it makes sense because everything is getting shorter lately. But I digress.

It was quite funny watching this person's apparent lack of knowledge about breast cancer.

Roleplayer: *she holds her chest because she has breast cancer*
And then you trying to find some sense of, well, sense:
[Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com]: wow - timeout. Cancer doesn't quite work like that, I think. Fever and passing out?
And then her trying to explain it away:
Roleplayer: *yea but she is sick on top of cancer and she had it for a while but she didnt know*

Priceless. And the not knowing what "latter" is. wtf? Ridiculous and utterly rubbish to roleplay on IM. Exacly why I don't do it has become clear.

[kittycatness.livejournal.com]

*exactly (pardon)

[aervir.livejournal.com]

And I thought I was weird...

Some teenagers should really have their licence to use a PC and surf the web revoked. Maybe someone could send them to read a good book or to go outside and get drunk at the nearest gas station.

[evilstorm.livejournal.com]

Make that some members of the human race, period.

[piecesofalice.livejournal.com]

That roleplay could quite possibly be the best thing I've read all week.

[nirix5.livejournal.com]

Hey, wow, that is definitely one of the best icons I've seen in a while. Much Brass love.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_lost_iris_/]

I'm sort of confused. Does the roleplayer think kissing automatically means NC-17? Or what? ^___^;;

Anyhoo, I love your icon. It amuses me :P

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Me thinks the NC-17 was for beyond the kissing. I'd find out if it didn't squick me so much.

Shirtless Warrick!

[nirix5.livejournal.com]

Hmmm. El Roleplayer is a whole lot of doom, but you're pretty good. I seriously heart your Warrick. If you ever want to RP CSI with a bunch of people who use the English language properly, let me know. We do it through comments on journals as well as AIM. (Because AIM hates my computer. Sigh.) We actually haven't done it in a while, but we could kick it back up again. Here, have a boring-yet-in-character example.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I'm flattered.:) Guess I'll have to think about it or something. I did some AD&D roleplaying in RL when I was younger, but that's some time ago. Don't think I have enough time to do it on a regular basis, but one never knows. Maybe I can be an Emergency-Backup-Warrick, heh.

[kittkatbar77.livejournal.com]

aw, there is much sympathy flowing through my computer towards you. I almost died laughing at the *holds chest because she has breast cancer* part. oh, and not knowing what latter is? if she wants to RP than maybe she should learn a little more first. And i think blocking her might be good idea. that way she would just never know when you are on. oh, and props to you for your good warrick. anything threre is to say about her catherine is much less complimentary. :P

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I'm sure the real Catherine would have given that weeping thing a good whipping.

Seriously, is "latter" that strange a word that someone wouldn't know it?

[dangerdizzycat.livejournal.com]

Ok thank you for that lol I finally know who was on that pic haha!

[erhothwen.livejournal.com]

♥♥♥Quentin Tarantino♥♥♥

I lurve that man.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

He has a certain goofy lovability.

[b2wm.livejournal.com]

There are days when I really do love my RP Suethor. We had a similar conversation concerning "vendetta," and she keeps threatening cyber, but nine out of ten times she can at least form full sentences. Not that I always understand them, but ain'tshesocute? *pets little RPer*

As for headdeskable plots, I feel your pain. I simply count her lucky that she doesn't know how to identify signs of breast cancer. Now would be a decent time to instruct her in the ways to recognise the differences between cancer and strokes, because she looks to be having a brain fart. Roleplayer, can you smile? Can you raise your arms above your head? Can you say "this logic is not Earth logic?" Good.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Hoo boy. There's roleplaying, and there's showing off your Inner Idiot. This? The latter.

*throws fish on silly RPers*

[kateanderson.livejournal.com]

Oh man, I needed a good laugh today! And fic updates! Thanks for posting the links to the interviews. Mmmm, Gary and C/W ship.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Mmmm indeed ;)

[binx-349.livejournal.com]

Oh OH, he/she pounced me today for roleplay fun!

I kinda pawned them off with "Oh wow, y'know its like 1am. *yawn* Must to bed! Sorry."

They must be on a 'Lets pick whoever's online and drag them into it' kick. Weird. I just heard someone else got IM'ed by her too. She/He is getting around!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Wow, she's a busy bee indeed.

Didn't want to have the same fun as me, huh? :P

[miss-andromache.livejournal.com]

I think the YTDAW'ers are being stalked. Just spoke to cowgirl_cj and the same girl IM'd her as well. Weird.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

How curious. And kinda desperate.

[cowgirl-cj.livejournal.com]

I was directed here by a mutual friend (miss_andromache)

This person just IM'd me, like half an hour ago. So I'm assuming she's randomly checking profiles at YTDAW for AOL names. She typed her first line (something like, *Grissom walked in and he had a cold because he was working so much and feeling crappy*) And I'm like...ya, I gotta go now.

I'm considering getting a new AOL name, just to be safe.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Oh dear oh dear. Wonder what wonderful diease Grissom would turned out to have? Menigitis that gave him headache? Lung cancer that made him cough?

Sheesh, she gets around. But you can just block her, that did the trick in the end for me (on the fifth nagging to play again, I'd had enough. Feh.)

[mademoisellenon.livejournal.com]

That was...special! She's 15, huh? How very astute and mature. That was very amusing though I am still surprised that you haven't murdered her. Eeep!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I can't murder by thought. (Alas, some would say.)

[scullyseviltwin.livejournal.com]

That is the EXACT same scenario she used with me, except Griss/Sara. I wanted to throttle her.

She IMs me every day too.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Run screaming away!

She started doing that to me and so I blocked her ass. While the stupidity is entertaining for a while, it quickly gets grating.

Also, same scenario? That girl needs an imagination stat.

oi vey, with the pain in the tuches...

[reverendkilljoy.livejournal.com]

Dear Miss Cam:

I thought this was very amusing, till I got to thinking of this person possibly, just maybe, actually being a 15-year old girl somewhere, communicating with us nutjobs via IM in the middle of the night.

I thought, "Hey, I research everything I write, down to drug dosages and train schedules. Why don't I tell her about how to diagnose breast cancer, its symptoms, etc...?""

Then I imagined testifying, "Honestly, Your Honor, I DID know she was a minor, but I was just instructing her on how to check for breast cancer..."

Kids, I will say this only once: The restraining orders are there for a reason.

Shalom!
ReverendKilljoy

I wouldn't worry...

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I'm sure you'd have people volunteering to be your alibi in five seconds flat. And to nominate her for a Darwin award since truly, such stupidity sooner or later gets you fame.