Wank, Likes and Tone

[misscam]

Harry Potter fandom wanks on

CSI fandom is apparently also behaving wanky. So. Much. Wank. Why, oh why? There are days I wonder why I'm still about - but I guess I'm too fond of fanfic writing and reading to really bugger off. Plus, you do meet some very neat people. *waves to flist*

Everyone keeps saying how fandom is like high school, but of course, I never went to high school. The Norwegian school system is somewhat different, as is the culture. Does make me wonder who I am in this fandom-high-school set-up, though. Mean girl? Quiet girl? Popular girl? Or all at once and neither? I'm not really sure I fit in any particular category. Maybe I should invent one for myself.

It did get me thinking about how you meet people online and form a liking to them - or not. It's impossible for me to judge how likeable I myself am, of course, but I have certain likeable traits (unless you're all just stringing me along, you cruel people). But I certainly have my bad sides, among them a tendency to hold grudges. And I remember slights. And once I've decided to dislike someone, I certainly don't change my mind easily.

Recently, I came to realise that someone I've known quite a while, and even was on friendly terms with a while, I now quite dislike. I also realised that I've been disliking her for quite some time, but had been trying to overcome it. I couldn't really exactly pinpoint why I disliked her. I'm sure some of you know that feeling - it's a bugger, as you get annoyed with yourself for feeling as you do and really, feel like there should be some justification for the dislike. At least that's how I tend to feel. People can be quite nice to me and I can still dislike them. There's not even always a seemingly logical reason to it. (And don't get all paranoid - said person is not on my flist.)

So what is likeability really? Is it sometimes as simple as two people meeting when both having a good day and dislike can be as simple as the same two having a bad day?

I think a lot is to do with tone - online, what you have are words and how those words were written and how they are read can differ. I know in the past I've gotten offended by how I felt the tone of a post to, without the poster neccessarily intending any offence. And really, it's hard to say who's right and who's wrong in such cases. You can be offensive without intension and offence can be found where none is, since words are always interpreted.

And then I think maybe it isn't so odd there's so much wank about anyway.

And then I think I should think less and write fanfic while ogling males instead. (Mmm, icon.)

So, as a fitting meme - comment with something likeable about me, and I shall reply with something likeable about you.

Or if that bores you or you've newly friended me - ask me any four questions you want and I'll answer and increase your knowledge of me (and maybe even my likeability, or lack thereof).

Comments

[puredeadthingy.livejournal.com]

You have an eye for detail in your writing.

[norwegianne.livejournal.com]

It's quite strange really, because I don't, generally as a rule, dislike people. I keep an open mind around most people. But then there are people whom I irrationally dislike from the minute I meet them. I can never explain why, I just do. Most of them are people I've met in real life. There are a couple of people online that other people seem to find quite friendly and everything, but reading through their journals/webpages something just rubs me wrong.

Mostly I'm a very ambivalent creature, who can't be bothered to dislike people at all. But some people just rubs me the wrong way. And then it will take a lot to persuade me to change my view on that person.

[avendya.livejournal.com]

Your snark is second-to-none.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I never think of you as a teenager at all.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I don't dislike a lot of people either, which is why it so annoys me when I seemingly do for no apparant reason. It just happens sometime and all I can really explain it with is that "rubs me the wrong way", as you said.

Sometimes I know it's cultural differences - I am after all bred into the culture of janteloven, and not everyone online obeys that one too much.

Humans are odd people.

[caribbeanblue.livejournal.com]

Because I'm terribly strange like that:

Miss Cam is awesome because she has a sense of humor about badfic (as opposed to seeing red ;-).

...and a question: CSI fandom is wanking? Where?

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Your interest in so many different things of life and science make me feel less alone.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

YTDAW and various LJs. As I understand, it started off as being about smutfics and expanded.

You're never dull.

[caribbeanblue.livejournal.com]

"Life is a cabaret," etc. Perhaps the outside world gets boring sometimes, but never fear, my dreamscape is here!

*goes looking at the wank -- not to participate, just because she's curious*

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Ballistics thread, baby.

[ladyumbra.livejournal.com]

I like that your willing to listen to everyons opinion even if you feel opposite.

[adoraheatherly.livejournal.com]

You have a sharp and open mind with an ability to commiserate on a wide range of topics.

[caribbeanblue.livejournal.com]

Thanks! ^_^

[bloodanna.livejournal.com]

You're honest about many things even if you know you're going to get trashed.

[sinneahtes.livejournal.com]

You're a very thoughtful person, and (as far as I can see) you're good at being both funny and serious, whenever a situation calls for one mood or the other.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

You don't hide yourself.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

You have a great deal of courage and care for others still despite having walked through the abyss.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

You view life slightly tilted and don't always look for the obvious.

[highwindpav.livejournal.com]

They're at it again? I was hoping spoilers would molify CSIdom a bit. Yeargh.

As far as dislike...eh, online, it seems to me that the people I dislike either never recognized that tone of voice does not translate and that sarcasm must be handled with caution, or they just rubbed me the wrong way for whatever reason. Can't be friends with everyone :/

OK, likable things about Miss Cam: You have the convictions of your beliefs and are unafraid of speaking them, which I respect a great deal. Also, you're funny and know how to deliver a proper smackdown.

[sekhmets-temple.livejournal.com]

Hi! I know I've not been around lately. Had a self-imposed hiatus - mostly to avoid Harry Potter book six spoilers. I'm sort of back now. By sort of I mean that I am back, but starting tomorrow, I'm leaving town for about nine days so I really won't back until after then. Okay, rambling now, sorry.

I see you've mentioned the Harry Potter fandom insanity. You'll forgive me if I don't follow the link. I've decided, after what little I've exposed myself to regarding HP online, that I'm staying away. It frightens me to death. I really don't understand it all.

I couldn't really exactly pinpoint why I disliked her. I'm sure some of you know that feeling - it's a bugger, as you get annoyed with yourself for feeling as you do and really, feel like there should be some justification for the dislike.

Sometimes, you just don't click with a person and there isn't a logical reason: they've done nothing to you, they seem generally nice, nobody else speaks ill of them. And still, you can't stand the person. I've experienced a few situations where I've met someone for the first time, but something just rubbed me the wrong way and I hated them from the start even thought they never said anything or did anything to justify my reaction. I guess it boils down to chemistry and the lack of it might inspire dislike? Who really knows? Us humans are a little strange at times. ;)

[darksylvia.livejournal.com]

You're the girl who everyone thinks is cool, but you're not part of the main clique. So the mean popular people let you exist and the unpopular people think you're popular.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Your LJ layout is gorgeous

You can strike up a conversation on just about anything and even make the weather seem interesting.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I guess there wasn't enough G/S spoilers to keep everyone entertained or something. Either that, or fandom's hitten critical mass. If so, duck.

I swear there are people who think being friends with everyone is a requirement. Arg.

We're on opposite sides of quite a few issues and I still like you more than I do a lot of people I utterly agree with. You got class.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Hope you have a nice trip wherever you're going.

And yes, HP fandom is scary, but if you view it with proper amount of alcohol, also quite hilarious. Might as well laugh at it, it saves some braincells.

Us humans are a little strange at times. ;)

Word. This is what makes us so fascinating.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Heh. Now that I hadn't heard before, but I certainly can't argue with it. I'm not a very clique-y person, I think. Might be my Norwegianness.

And you, my dear, lust and slash with admirable style.