Writing Updates and Slight Rant

[misscam]

East of the Sun, West of the Moon has Chapter Ten up, and there be C/W naughtiness. (You can also find it here)

You realise just how much stories can live their own life when you have carefully planned just how Grissom is going to be an ass - and instead, he actually acts somewhat considerate and ends up taking a risk. Grissom, why are you being so nice in my mind? Stop it! (This is a future chapter - I just finished ch. 16. Go fast-writing me.)

Also, I had an evil W/S C/W G/S plotbunny of doom last night just as I was going to sleep. I even have parts written down. I'm a bad girl.

I'm also carefully preparing for my 500th post on GAFF with a truly hideous G/S story that I've tortured some of my friends with. But all this leads me to today's topic of minor rant - sex and CSIfic. Not always a match made in heaven.

Now, you're young, you want to write sex - and you don't yet have that much experience yourself. That's fine. I'm not asking you to go out and get laid in the name of smutfic research (unless you want to). But if you want to write Grissom and Sara happily at it on Grissom's desk, or Catherine and Warrick playing naughty bunnies in the lockerroom, *know what you write*. And by 'know', I don't mean read romance novels. A few facts of sexlife:

1) Simultaneous orgasms are not the norm. They are rare.
2) A body of seventeen is not the same as a body of fifty nor is the sexual stamina. Grissom does not have the power of the Energizer Bunny.
3) Sex isn't always the greatest thing you've ever had. Sometimes, it can be meh.
4) Sex does not heal any of the following: Rape, torture, abuse, hunger, wars, broken bones or amnesia. It can be a comfort, yes, but if it healed, the world's population would be a heck of lot more healthy in all ways.
5) The penis is a nifty thing, yes, but the mere sight of it or thrust of it will not make a woman orgasm at the spot. Know thine clitoris.
6) Sex isn't the only way a couple bonds.
7) People in their thirties and fourties have as a rule had sex quite a few times. They are not going to start acting like teenage virgins all of a sudden.
8) It takes a couple a little while to sort out the terrain and get to know just what the other partner likes. No one instantly knows every thing another human being gets off on. Not even Grissom.

I could probably think of a few more, but I'm lazy.

Today's meme:
Invent-a-meme! Comment and give me a meme to do of your invention. I will answer in the comments.

Comments

[hadria.livejournal.com]

WHAt! You mean Grissom isn't a 50 year old sex god with a fifteen inch penis that miraculously fits into a vagina and hits all the right buttons resulting in a simultaneous orgasm that heals all of Sara's issues from her past from just simple in-out thrusting, after which Grissom immediately declares his undying love and proposes, not knowing that his virile sperm has just gotten Sara pregnant?

Surely, you kid.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I know, it's shocking, life-shattering, in fact. But it is true. Grissom is not the Buddha of sex or the Miracle Penis.

Take deep breaths, the shock will fade.