Dear World...

[misscam]

It's time for another "Dear World", I feel...

Dear BBC,

GIMME CONFIRMED DATE FOR SEASON TWO NOW YOU SOULSTEALING BASTARDS ARGH ARGHCould you maybe soon enlighten the world with your confirmed date for Doctor Who's next season? Please? I shall wub you even more.

DesperationLove,
Cam

****

Dear Bishop Ole Kvarme,

so "many people can help gays to change sexual orientation", huh? And you tell this to a group where gay and lesbian church-goers meet after encouraging "dialogue" with them? See this? This is my finger. See that? That is your ass. Guess what you're gonna do?

And just FYI, "dialogue" consists of more than one party making an ass of himself, get what I'm saying? Also, you are a member of the State Chruch of Norway and the people of Norway have quite different ideas about homosexuality. You work for us, you listen to us, you ignoramus of a beard.

I'm so glad we had this dialogue.

Cam
P.S As my dear lotus79 put it, "and many people can teach Fundies to be tolerant". Sign-up is free, I promise.

****

Dear Chirac,

AHAHAHAHAHAH!

...

HAHA.

Cam

****

Dear "abortion for rape victims is not needed",

WHAT

Seriously, what? Did rocks drop down from the sky and hit you in the noggin? Did you smoke funky things? Did you decide today was "bring your own stupid, stupid, stupid opinions" day? WHAT

I hear the world does wonderful reality checks these days, though. Order one with a sidedish of compassion, why don't you.

No love and more disgusted eyerolling,
Cam

****

Dear Grissom/Catherine shippers,

hey, your ship is not among my ships, but I have friends among your number and I even sometimes read goodfic for it, so a little friendly advice? STOP THE SODDING PATERNITY TEST CALLS whenever a CSI ep is said to have a twist. Lindsey is not Grissom's daughter, and I'm going to tell you why. CSI is not a soap. CSI is not a fanfic. CSI is not all about the ships. CSI is not even mostly about the ships. CSI has never once indicated Grissom and Catherine had an affair in the past. CSI is not a soap.

Also, the icons with paternity test calls stopped being cute before they were made.

Write more goodfic and less theories of idiocy, mmkay?

Could be at least tolerance if you'd just stop that,

Cam

****

Dear Tazzer,

just cos you don't like a character doesn't mean bashing her should become the purpose of your fandom life, okay? Or your fanfic.

No tolerance for you,
Cam

P.S WHY MUST YOU TAINT ONE OF MY SHIPS WITH YOUR PRESENCE WHY

****

Dear CSI shippers in general,

could we try less war and more writing porn in our various trenches? It would be so appreciated. Also, those grenades of chatspeak and English abuse are deadly, man. Watch where you toss them.

Wearied sigh,
Cam

****

Dear (Some) Doctor Who fanfic writers,

the show doesn't suck. How about we try real hard that the fanfic doesn't as well, huh? So here are a few tips:

YOUR - Possessive. As in "your fanfic".
YOU'RE - Shortened form of you are. As in "You're writing fanfic, I see".
THEIR - Possessive again. As in "their spellcheck".
THEY'RE - Shortened form of they are. As in "they're not trying very hard, are they?"
ROSE - Doctor's companion. Sometimes awesome, sometimes not, sometimes open for interpretation. NOT YOU.
THE DOCTOR - Not in fact your dream version of Chris or David, okay?
SEX ED - What you should have before you write any kind of detailed smut, mmkay?
FANFIC - What you're writing until BBC coughs up actually money for it and until then, STFU is a very good look to be aiming for.

More love when more effort,
Cam

****

Dear Doctor/Rose shippers,

let's try not to go into fits and Caps Lock when something occurs in season two that might not be all good, ship-wise, okay? Let's train on that "breathe, breathe, keep sanity" early on, eh?

Early love,
Cam

****

Dear lotus79

I WIN. And you're mad as a hatter.

Cam

****

Dear Norway,

I love you in spring. I snuggle you in your warming sun. I hand!porn you in your melting snow. SO WHAT'S WITH THE SODDING -17, EH?

Ready with the love as soon as you're ready with the proper spring,
Cam

****

Dear BBC,

GIMME DATE GIMME NOW WHINGE WHINGE WHINGE Could I raise the date thing again? It would be ever so nice to have, you see. And season two even more so.

Premature love,
Cam

As ever, feel free to "Dear Cam" me.

Comments

[lotus79.livejournal.com]

Dear misscam,

YOU SO DO NOT WIN. HOR.

Saz

P.S. I DON’T CARE? I WILLINGLY DIED FOR YOU.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Dear lotus79

HAH!

YOU ONLY DIE FOR P0RN YOU DOUBLE HOR

WIN IS ME

Cam

[silvery-lass.livejournal.com]

I think season 2 of Doctor Who will start airing in April, because I think the DVD with "The Christmas Invasion" and the first episode will come out in the beginning of May.

I do think Catherine's husband sort of accused her of having an affair with Grissom in one of the earlier season, but I think he just wasn't to pleased with that they were such good friends.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Yeah, April 15th has been flaoted as a possible date. I just want it confirmed, dammit.

He did, but he was Eddie, and Grissom and Catherine themselves have certainly never indicated that his allegations had any basis in truth.

[hadria.livejournal.com]

Is Tazzer into the yo!bling now? I must check it out and see the crazy. I very much missed these paternity icons.

Ugh that abortion is not needed for rape victims. One of their other brilliant comments is "if a woman is being abused it's her responsibility to leave the relationship". It must be nice to not have to live in reality. I'm so much with the headdesk, facepalm, headconcrete right now.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

She's been popping into the C/W thread at TalkCSI, yeah. You can imagine how much that thrilled me.

Yeah, I know, the more that chick typed, the more I boggled. And she claims to have worked at a shelter for abused women, in which case she should know it's not that bloody easy, sheesh!

[kahva.livejournal.com]

That "abortion for rape victims is not needed" idiot is unfortunately reminding me of a doctor (no longer alive) who became a state legislator, and promptly put his foot in his mouth with the infamous statement that a woman couldn't get pregnant from being raped. His reasoning, as I recall, was something along the lines of the trauma being so great that a pregnancy couldn't occur. I can't remember what particular bill was being discussed in the legislature at the time, but BOY did he ever get an earful. At least he didn't try and excuse his mis-guided words by saying that he was a dental surgeon, not an ob/gyn or anything like that. He did admit that what he had said was wrong after a while. Grudgingly perhaps, but he did admit it.

What was scarier is that before he got into politics, he was a sometimes guest host on a morning TV news/talk show I worked on at my first TV station. And he would later go on to be my mother's dental surgeon. Somebody I knew and worked with on occasion, an otherwise nice guy, going on to say something that stupid later on... Very disillusioning.

He and his office did do a good job on Mom's oral surgery, though. Very nice folks in that office. If he had just stayed out of politics...

[misscam.livejournal.com]

...

I'm sorry, was there any signs he'd suffered some head trauma or something? The egg doesn't know if the sperm coming at it is from a guy you did willingly or a guy you didn't, for crying out loud? What does he think the egg comes equipped with, rape detector?

That sure is an interesting guy to have had near your teeth.

[oddlyfamiliar.livejournal.com]

Dear "abortion is not needed for rape victims",

I'm torn between head!desk and face!palm, as a comment to your craziness.

Perhaps I shall go with both.

Head!desk!face!palm...

Michelle.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

When in doubt, go for both.

[kittycatness.livejournal.com]

Dear "abortion" nazi,

I don't believe abortion is right, either, but I'm not going to petition to have it banned because it's necessary. Which is worse, a "safe" (for the mother, anyway) procedure where a person may reflect on and have the opporotunity to reflect on that decision OR a person with a coathanger "performing" a VERY dangerous procedure without medical supervision and/or medical care for the mother? Or someone throwing themselves down stairs or killing themselves because of the shame and trauma that they suffered? Think about a person's emotions before you ponce about like you know everything.

Go away.
Me.




Dear Cam,

Thank you for selling my soul to Doctor Who.

Much love,
Me.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Dear kittycatness,

Doctor Who loves your soul too.

Yayness for more DW recruits. And your skill at logic. If only more would embrace it...

Ever love,
Cam

[mthespinner.livejournal.com]

We used to have an elected official of more than ordinary stupidity in the commonwealth of Pennsylvania. This is saying quite a bit because this commonwealth grows stupid legislators as a matter of course. I digress.
Mr. Friend (it's been a few years, but yes, that was his name,) stated repeatedly that a woman who has been raped would not concieve because "her body would secrete a secretion that would prevent conception." Needless to say, the gormless lollardly lubbuck was voted out of office...some depths of stupidity are too much for even Pennsylvania.

(Dr. Who is contemplating moving into my house because I make superlative tea-and the scones and creme fraiche aren't too bad either.)

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Please tell this is teh same guy kahva talked about or I will weep knowing there's at least two of them to have graced this world.

You Doctor-thief, you. Stop tempting him with tea.

[immoralilly.livejournal.com]

*Whinges for the date right along with you.*
The BBC is sneaky with that sort of thing. Meanies.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

They're so mean and I still love them. Woe.

[dragonlp86.livejournal.com]

Dear misscam

You are still my hero.

~dragonlp86

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Aaaw.

As long as I don't have to wear tights, it's all good.

[knorg.livejournal.com]

Dear misscam,

My reaction to Chirac has been much the same.

Knorg,
still chuckling.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Just goes to show the true international language is pointing and laughing.

[git-the-goddess.livejournal.com]

All right, i'm working on my breathing, but what do you mean 'keep sanity'?

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Check under your bed, it should still be there, wrapped in its box.

[drakyndra.livejournal.com]

Dear Doctor/Rose shippers:

No, do go all capslocky and crazy if something a bit anti-shippy happens. Then I can report you all to fandom_wank

Love, Draky.

[misscam.livejournal.com]

But then I'll get a headache and lose all will to write and shrivel up like a raisin. Or maybe not.

[avari-elf.livejournal.com]

I got into a fight with my cousins yesterday because I said what Chirac had done was ridiculous and humiliating.

Only my Dad was on my side. I love my Dad. But then, you know, he works in Asia and uses English everyday, so he has a more accurate vision of RL.

*is pissed off*

[misscam.livejournal.com]

This actually become a point of debate in France, then? I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I like France and all, but you can be... very French sometimes.

[chicklet73.livejournal.com]

Bwahahahahaha

Dear Cam,

YOUR brilliant

Hive-mindedly yours,
chicklet

p.s. NOTHING NOT GOOD WILL HAPPEN SHIP-WISE IN SEASON 2, NO WAY

[misscam.livejournal.com]

BUT I HAVE SEEN SNOGGING IN THE PROMOS! YOU LIE!

[boz4pm.livejournal.com]

Mon cher Miss Cam,

You iz most ungracious to be zo mean to moi. I waz onlee defending mon cher langue which iz ze best langue in all ze world. I may be one hundred and sree yearz old, but I can steel act like a petit baby if I want too. Yes, yes, I can and you cannot stop me!

*stamps foot* *throws self on floor and starts having a trantrum* *holds breath* *goes blue in the face*

You iz ze big meanee to rire at moi comme ca! C'est insupportable! Zut, alors! T'as pas honte?!

Yours,
Sexy Jacques (still throwing his toys out of the pram)

[misscam.livejournal.com]

Dear Jacques,

your tantrums are still less impressive than Bush's. More effort, plz.

Not yours,
Norwegian Cam

[smalldiver.livejournal.com]

Dear Misscam,

But liek OMG they started it! *Points to opposing ship* our ship is teh tru luv 4eva! OTP!!!11!one! Ev1 else is just dela-delusin-delusoni- STUPID!

- Teh shippers of teh BEST ship in CSI CANON!!1!

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, I don't speak moron.

[greyladybast.livejournal.com]

Dear Miss Cam,

You think this is bad, wait'll you see the bitching over the future Eleven. (when we get one, that is)

Or worse, when Rose leaves. The new Companion is gonna get run through the woodchipper, poor thing.

Yeah, Whodom is exactly the same as it's always been. Kinda comforting, in a way.

Tea and love,
Bast

[misscam.livejournal.com]

I'll pretend all that isn't true. Because I don't like waking up with a headache in the morning and delusions are so nice to live in.

SUNSHINE AND DAISIES AND SNOGGING, YAY!

[evilstorm.livejournal.com]

*has to agree with the Dear BBC letters*

[glinda-penguin.livejournal.com]

Dear misscam,

You are in fact somewhat demented...I like that about you.

*pats gently upon head*

Hugs and continuing insanity,
Glinda x

Ps Abortion nazi's? I want to hang them up by their ankles until they see sense, as clearly their world is the wrong way round.

[l-ecumedesjours.livejournal.com]

*snickers* *de-lurks, as she is bound to do about once per year*

Dear Chirac,

Jacquot, on t'aime, mec. Mais c'était peut-être un tout petit peu excessif, non?//Jacquot, we love you, man. But that was maybe just a bit excessive, no?

Bisous, from a wee francophone lass, deep in the heart of Quebec, who does indeed love the French language, but, seriously, dude. Chill.
Emilie

Although, coming from somewhere where the French vs English issue is still something delicate, I can sort of understand where he's coming from.
Doesn't take away the fact his reaction was ridiculous though.

[l-ecumedesjours.livejournal.com]

Almost forgot.

Dear Norway,

YOU STOLE MY COLD, COLD SPRING. GIVE IT TO ME!

...

Love (and massive depression due to the fact it's above 0. IN MARCH.)
Em

*re-lurks*